Your bedroom is a sacred sanctuary where you spend almost a third part of the day for sleep, rest, and sex. As such, it must be conducive to these activities. But as time pass by, you tend to forget what it’s intended for. You do bedtime activities or routines that eventually sabotage the quality of your sleep, your intimacy or your sex life.
Some couples seek help about why their intimacy has dwindled without realizing what they do on a daily basis contributes to their poor relationship. Don’t wait to experience the same fate. Spark your romance again by not doing the following things in the bedroom.
1. Don’t spend so much time on your screen
Bringing your gadget on the bed is a trend nowadays. Scrolling your feed before dozing off might be a convenient way to socialize, play games or watch interesting videos but it’s also the shortest way to kill romance and reduce intimacy. Instead of giving more time to your partner beside you, you’re creating your own world right before her eyes. You’re excluding her from your cool down time. And if she’s also doing the same thing, don’t wonder if your relationship will plummet down in the days to come.
If you want to keep the romance alive, make some time for romance. Set aside days where it’s dedicated only for more intimacy and good sex. Light candles. Play soothing and relaxing music. Bring some wine and engage in small chit chat that can lead to more intimate conversations and sex.
2. Don’t sleep with clothes that don’t make you feel sexy
In a committed or long-term relationship, what you wear when you sleep seldom matters. All you have in mind is to feel extra comfortable. But not all comfortable clothes can make you feel sexy. Your sweatpants or old shirt can make you feel at ease though you look like more of a scarecrow in them. It’s forgivable to wear it at times. But for the sake of spicing things up, avoid wearing it all the time.
Wear clothes that can make you feel manly or macho, one in which she can’t take her eyes off you. Better yet, go to bed naked. That is if you want a steamy session before dozing off.
3. Don’t bring a rough day on bed
Bad days are inevitable. Everybody has them. But don’t bring them inside the bedroom. It can kill the mood even before you have started. Stress has been linked to ED. Even if your dick is as strong as you wish it to be, the bad thoughts can still impair your performance.
Some say sex is a good way to release some stress. It might be if you’re able to set aside the events of the day from your mind and focus on the task at hand. The effects of good sex can activate your happy hormones and make you feel less stressed. Seeing an ugly event from a calm and relaxed mind makes it less important.
4. Don’t watch Netflix on bed
Relationship and health experts share the same view – if possible, let there be no electronics inside the bedroom. Let it be a place for sleep and sex only. But this isn’t just possible. We’ve included Netflix in our bedtime routine.
According to one sex expert, Netflix can spice up your romantic relationship if you just know how. Watching passionate sitcoms or movies that inspire intimacy serves your sex life best. But if you’re focused on heavy drama or action flicks, you’re naturally not doing any favor for your sex life.
5. Don’t sleep with pets or children
Nobody wants to have sex with the cat sleeping soundly on their feet or quickly jumping on the bed from out of nowhere. If you’re sleeping with a partner, give your pet a good place to sleep outside of the bedroom.
If you have kids, they will insist on sleeping with you at times. But don’t spoil them always. Say no when you and your wife are losing the intimacy that both of you needed.
6. Don’t make your bedtime routine just a routine
A bedtime routine can be the same for everybody. It consists of brushing teeth, cleansing oneself or showering, putting on sleepwear, smacking goodnight your partner’s lips, then dozing off. The same goes on every night.
This is not how you end a long day and start a relaxing sleep. You’ll be more relaxed if you give each other a soft massage and lots of touching and cuddling that may ultimately lead to good sex. You may not aim for sex after a tiring day, but ending it with an engaging conversation with your partner can enhance connection and intimacy.
7. Don’t make your room a bundle of mess
Clutter is being linked to a busy mind. Psychologist Sherrie Bourg Carter says clutter can exacerbate feelings of anxiety. It visually signals your work is not completely done yet. And it draws your attention from what you’re focusing on, causing a mental overload.
Try to eliminate clutter from your bedroom. Make it a hobby to clean up a pile of clothes on the floor or scattered stuff and place them in their designated places. A 10-minute quick clean up isn’t so hard. It takes only this short while to set the mood for better sex.
8. Don’t snack on your bed
Avoid eating late night snacks for two reasons: it might give you an unpleasant breath or it can stain your sheets. Eating something when you’re already full from dinner may harm your digestive system as well. When you don’t feel well, you’re likely not in the mood for better sex.
9. Don’t make your bed uninviting
Sheets that haven’t been changed for more than a week can’t give you a comfy feeling. Whenever you feel frisky and want to initiate some longer cuddles, set the mood right. Begin with clean sheets. Getting naked under soap smelling covers just feels good.
10. Don’t allow your schedule to come in between
Coming home late when your partner is already asleep and getting up late when your partner is hurrying for work can be a bit crazy and can threaten your intimacy too. This can make time for sex elusive. But don’t allow the differences in your schedule to ruin your romance. Find ways to meet in the middle even if it means one has to make a compromise.
You can choose from having sex late at night or in the wee hours of the morning, depending on who wants to sacrifice their sleep. The sacrifice can be sweet when it saves your relationship and sex life.